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How to Start Planning Your Wedding (5 Steps)

Updated: Mar 21, 2021

Planning a wedding is quite the undertaking. There are so many moving pieces and at first glance, it can all seem super overwhelming. And even if it doesn't seem overwhelming at first, the wave of planning will probably hit you at some point. Luckily, like most things, taking the planning process piece by piece can help a ton. Here are some quick and easy ways to either start planning for your big day or make sure you're on the right path to avoid being sucked under the crashing wave.

When beginning the planning process, there are 5 fundamental things you should ensure you consider before getting lost in the nitty-gritty.


1st: Consider your motivation for having a wedding

--> Are you doing this because you want to celebrate your love with a big party? Or rather do you want to celebrate with those nearest and dearest to you? Is this something you've always dreamt of? Or is it perhaps something your family has always wanted for you? How can you strike a balance between your family's values and your own for the day?

This may seem straightforward, but having it written down so you can reference it later is so vital to getting the day started off on the right foot.

2nd: Write down your own values.

It's your special day. So before your overbearing mother steps in with her own demands for the day, consider the following questions:

--> What values align with your motivation? How can you integrate these values into your wedding? What are your top 10 hopes for the day? Write all ten down. Now cross off five. Then cross off two more. And two more. Now you're left with your most important value for your wedding day. Keep this core value in the back of your head so that when things start to get overwhelming, you can keep your focus on this one crucial piece. Remembering this value, along with the other nine on your list, will help you to stay true to yourself throughout the planning process.

3rd: Rank your priorities and stick with them

-> Right now is a good time to sit down with your partner and make a list of your top 20 individual priorities for the big day. Make sure to really think about the day from beginning to end and try to keep in mind the way you want to feel at each stage. Now, compare lists and make a collective list of 5-10 that each of you had in common. This is the golden list. Don't lose this. Seriously, embroider it on a pillow, or maybe just hang it up on your fridge. When the going gets tough with the planning, refer back to this list to make sure both of your priorities are being met.

4th: Discuss these key questions

Now's the time to get the ball rolling about these important topics. Even if the deadline isn't pressing, it's never too early to make sure you and your partner are on the same page. Start by asking these questions:

-> How do we want to feel during our wedding? Happy? Elated? Energized? Excited? Laidback? Relieved? Which is the most important?

-> Do we see our wedding as a small, intimate, gathering? Or a big, rambunctious, party?

-> What time of the year is it? Is it cold? Warm? Hot?

-> In our dream wedding, where are we? A rustic barn? A mountain top elopement? A grand hotel overlooking a lake? A tropical island?

-> How can we describe our aesthetic? Is it more of a rustic feel or a cosmopolitan chic? Are we looking for more of an old-fashioned feel? Or a new-age, modern look?

-> How important is tradition to us? Do we have family traditions that we must make sure we include?

-> What parts of the wedding are of the highest priority to us? If we couldn't include a few parts, which would we cut out?

-> What are the biggest financial priorities for us? High-quality food? An open bar? Dresses? Make-up and hair? Venue? Photographer? Videographer? Music? What are of the least priority to us?

5th: Remember to have fun

-> This is literally all that matters. Although the day is important for your family and friends. It's not their day. It's yours. So when the going gets a little tough and maybe you start to lose sight of your initial excitement, don't forget: it's your day. It's okay if you don't know all the answers to the above questions. It's okay if it seems like a lot right now. But just remember, the end result is going to be A BLAST. And the process should mostly carry the same energy and sentiment.

But if it does seem like too much... Don't forget you can always elope!


Okay, so those are the initial steps to start planning your wedding. You got this!

Follow along as I'll be posting more guides to help make the wedding planning process as easy and straightforward for you as possible!


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